I’ve been binging TV, like I’m sure most of us are. I ran once, it went pretty well. I miss going out and socializing. I feel like this would happen regardless of COVID since two of my few friends here moved out of state. I’ve been working remotely.
We moved to a new apartment, it’s cute. There’s some decorative/exposed wooden beams and the floor is sealed concrete (dark brown). The animals are all happy. We reconfigured the guinea pig cage so instead of a 5×5 with a separator in the middle they each have their own 3×3. Max (sun conure) is really enjoying the balcony. The complex has a parking garage, a pool, and a gym; we haven’t been to the pool or the gym, yet.
One of the shows I watched was Ugly Betty and she had such a passion for writing and knew what her goal was and she got there so fast and it was because she “followed her bliss” and I just feel like I don’t know what I want to be. I like my job, my goals are so far away (time wise) and I wonder if I am out of place. Watching that and the Bold Type and these shows with twenty something year olds doing exactly what they wanted to and reaching goals so early in life, it’s beautiful and hopeful and unrealistic and depressing. I know that at 29 it’s okay to still be working up the ladder, no one is CEO at thirty unless (okay, maybe someone but that’s not normal). I know I’m okay, I just wonder if there’s more right now.
Betty also starts a blog, gets an award for her blog, has super fans, and while we don’t know what she blogs about she seems to be really passionate about whatever it is she’s covering. I feel like I write what I’m feeling, not fueling feelings by writing; not chasing a passion and writing about whatever that is.
I feel like I’m doing everything right, and I’m happy, I just also feel like something is missing. I love my fiance, I love my pets, I love my home. I have a job that I like with coworkers that I mostly like. I don’t have a passion, though. Should I? Do most people? How many is “most”? What are they passionate about? How do you find your passion?
I know, I’m sure, that a large potion of the tiny hole that I feel is due to just being locked up due to COVID. I definitely need to run more, and write more, and drink more water.
Anywho, that’s my check in, hope everything in your life is going well.
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